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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Hate For Athletics

Eric P. really hates
Hey, lacrosse guy, you're the coolest guy ever! It's so cool that you carry around that stick with you everywhere you go, amazing us with how you twirl it around so fast and keep that ball in there. I wouldn't know what you're doing with it in the library, but that's probably because I'm just not as cool as you. I cant believe I've been wasting my time with the good American classic sports like baseball and football, and not gotten into lacrosse. Man, I wish I could be so cool as to pop my collar and carry that stick to parties and into the bathroom with me. Listen jerk ass, you play lacrosse, good for you. I play baseball, you don't see me carrying a bat or a glove around with me. Quit raping strippers, quit trying to be somebody from Laguna Beach, and put that fucking stick away already!

Another Juliet Hateback

This one from Josh
So, you think "emo" is a very talented genre of music? Emocore my ass all emo is is the result of the Punk genre taking a big fucking shit in the toliet. You pretend to hate emo and call it faggy, but come on, you're really a self hating fag aren't you? Or lesbian whatever. I wish your mom's HMO covered abortion. I hate you

Hateback: Hating On Emo Haters

Joe hates Juliet from New Jersey
I hate people who identify emo as a legitimate type of music, those who will defend its whiny lyrics and weak power (like home office) chords. I hate people who classify bands such as Sunny Day Real Estate as talented musicians. Well, to be honest thats all I've got. I started out thinking how hilariously witty my "I hate" response was going to be but, that, um, sorta' fell apart. Hey the title wasn’t bad though eh?

Hate For Male Beauty

Jeremy C. from Washington State University really hates
I really hate "Guy who jogs around campus with his shirt off". I realize you're better looking than me and have an awesome body. Ok, it is fine you get way more sex than me, but the last thing I need when I wake up on Wednesday with a hangover and an orange tint to my lips becaues I went on a drunken eating binge and finished an entire bag of Cheetos is to see your "better than ass" jogging right in front of me. I swear to God if you keep it up the next time you come jogging by me in your addidas shorts and bronzed body you're getting a branch in the back of your head. Watch out asshole.

Hate For Caring

Cher from Windsor University really hates
I hate those people who pretend to care about public tragedies as if it were their own. I am not heartless, and I do have compassion, but I'm not about to spend an hour saying 'what a great man that police officer was' near tears about someone whom I have never met, planned to meet, and maybe would have had the pleasure of meeting in a traffic stop as a crammed my weed in my glove compartment. Maybe you feel that pretending to know someone important makes you important. Or maybe you know that anything you say can't be argued because the person in question is dead. You're not a fucking superior person for faking to care about some random. No one buys it. You don't have enough close friends to care about, so you hold onto these imaginary ones you find out about in the news. If you actually went through the pain of losing someone you care about, you wouldn't want to even fake that feeling ever again. You fucking make me sick with your 'moments of silence' and hugs of comfort. You never knew the fucking guy! Take your donations and carnations and shove them up your ass! I fucking hate you!

Hate For The Highway

Jasmine from USC
I spend a good two hours driving a day and the trucks that get on the freeways in OC and LA really piss me off. I understand that for the most part they are larger vehicles so they cant take ramps as fast, but driving 40 with a posted speed limit of 65 (which everyone knows means drive 80) is just absolutely ridiculous. If I drove a Hummer I would just ram them. However, as I am confined to a Civic, I must simply channel my rage into hoping that they will catch a glance of my severely discontented face, which of course they won't because they are approximately one story above me. And that is just the big rigs. In Orange County we also get a lot of gardener trucks on the freeway. These idiots also drive slow simply because they cannot afford to get pulled over for fear of being deported back to Central America. But the slow driving isn't the only terrible part of the gardener trucks. These are usually early 90s pickups that have been shoddily converted into gardener trucks which house lawnmowers, rakes, shovels and whatever else it is that gardeners use. Said tools are barely attached to said truck which, quite frankly, scares me to death. Now it is to be understood that if they drove much faster on the freeway then these rusted landscaping mediums might actually fall off causing even more anger on my part, but my point is that none of these vehicles should be allowed on the freeway. Ever. It is with great rarity the freeways in Southern California are clear enough to actually go the speed limit. Please don't ruin it for the rest of us.

Hate For The Comically Challenged

Liam M. hates
I hate people who make one funny joke in their whole life and then think they are incredibly funny. These people are not funny, their fags. Fags whose only way to coolness is by telling the same fucking average joke over and over again. For example, lets say there is this massive d-bag at your school who everyone hates and makes fun of with equal ability. Then Faggy McFag comes along and says a joke that is average and overused(That guy is really gay he must like to do dudes up the butt) something to that affect. Some fag laughs and this tool with low self esteem thinks he's cool. Now that he is on a powertrip of gayness and he doesn't stop insulting people using the same insult. Eventually he tries to worm his way into a group of friends, but luckily most people aren't gay so they tell to go to his dorm and kill himself. I wish they would listen to this advice because some where down the road they'll do the same fucking thing again.
Notice the irony here in that Liam berates people for relying on trusted fall backs but calls his nemesis a 'fag' in almost every sentence.

Hate For K-Fed

George H. hates
He is the poster child for white trash all he needs is a trailer and a car on blocks. Not only has he ruined Brittany Spears life and the other girl he has two children with. He has also ruined the world; people now think it's cool to dress as a complete scum bag. These people now flood every bar you go to in hopes of scoring a chick like Brittany. What they don't realize is that she is white trash too, and if that's the girl you want then you should move to Po Dunk County and you can score one there. If any one should have there nuts cut off its him, I mean seriously he could impregnate a girl from 6ft away and then just as easily leave them and take there money. Then this guy tries to make a CD....JUST FOR THE RECORD YOU HAVE NO MUSIC ABILITY....my retard friend has more music ability then he does. My final thoughts are these....take the Budweiser out of your hand and out of your ass, put the drugs down, get a job and some new clothes, and for once shower. You probably smell like a monkey's ass.

Hate For Mega-Nerds

Anonymous hates
I hate that guy at the Electronic store that has to tell me about his whole freakin WoW character. I just want to buy my pre-used 5 dollar game so I can kill a few hours of time before giving up and getting drunk. I don't give a rats ass how you found the Level 64 exp#44 sword. SHUT UP!!!

Hate For Almost Family

Matt H. from Wesley College hates
I hate my girlfriend's annoying, slutty, pathetic excuse for a human being sister. She is a stuck-up, phys co-pathetic, mentally challenged bitch. OH your 21, wanna buy me beer? OK. I get me beer but where the fuck is my change bitch. You say its "Only five dollars." That's my 5 dollars bitch. I bought your fat ass a forty too, what more do you want you stingy Jew. I had to drive you here because your stupid ass can't fucking operate a car, and when you do it always seems to end up with horrific results.Two totaled cars since I have been dating your sister (1 year). You are a total waste of oxygen and the way I see it is your taking precious seconds off my life.Something must be done. Hopefully while your fat ass is in the ocean, poachers mistake you for a whale and use you for target practice. Then you go out and leave your fuckin crying, spoiled rotten, worthless child behind (who is going to need some serious treatment around 6 or 7) for my girlfriend and I to watch.