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Monday, February 20, 2006

Hate For Naturalism

Patrick C. at UCSC
I Hate that old man in the locker room at my school that feels the need to walk around naked. First off, what the hell are you doing here. You aren't a professor, and you definitely aren't a student. You may have been at one point, when you got back from the Korean war. Why the hell are you here, and why the hell are you naked. But one old guy is never enough, there is always at least one or more, as if suddenly the school had opened up a shuffleboard court. And you two sit there, and shoot the shit, about this and that, without a care in the world, while your graying pubic hairs and shriveled up trouser snake are in plain view of the world Ok, so you come from a generation where men were not uncomfortable to be naked around each other, because there was no modesty, and it was not some bizarre homosexual thing to want to be naked in front of another man, but times have changed. I am comfortable changing in front of guys so long as I have a towel around my waist. I know that not a single person in the locker room cares to gaze upon my hairy ass, so I don't show it. And of course, as I wrap up my brief time in the locker room, you assholes are joined by a third, and you block my way to the exit, so that i have to close my eyes, and try and squeeze past you so that i am not forced to brush up against an flabby octogenarian ass. You guys are gross, your skin is sagging, you dick is shriveled, and you have excessive amounts of hair coming out your ears. Because of you assholes, I am ashamed to admit that i have seen more dicks than tits since I came to college. I didn't come here so see geriatric dicks. I fucking hate you!
Listen dude, if I can;t be myself in the locker room, then where can I be, huh?


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