Contribute to The Famous Hate List, send your hate to Streeter@StreeterSeidell.com Just make sure to include your first name, last initial and school.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Hate For Fakers

HOT READ!!!

Brian S. from Quinnipiac University

You know who I hate: People with handicap parking signs that don't need them. Have you ever gone to a Dunkin Donuts or a supermarket, and seen an old person getting out of a car in a handicap spot? She is standing up fine, picking up her 15 pound tote-bag like she is Hercules and walking like she's walking more gracefully than your 13 year old sister at ballet class? Bitch. She doesn't need a handicap parking sign for her car. People who deserve those can't walk, run, or knit at the speed of light like this granny could.

Reasons that people are getting these signs today: They are old, blind, fat.

Old: Okay, in my opinion, and hopefully the world's, there is no reason why old people should still be driving, let alone parking closer to my destination than me. Just because they are wise and have seen more of the horrors of life than me doesn't mean that they get to park their boat-like Cadillac (whose mirrors are never used when reversing) closer to the food court in the mall than me. They have had more cheeseburgers than me, I need to catch up by getting there before them (which I’ll probably do anyway because we all know that people with handicap stickers will fake being slow so as to retain the glorious piece of cardboard that hangs from their rearview).

Blind: What!!! Blind people driving? That is almost as fucked up as Bush being re-elected. Think about this, someone who is legally unable to see, has not only continued to carry a license around in their wallet, but gets to park in a blue-highlighted space that they will never know is any different than the others except for the fact that it is a shorter distance that they will have to feel out with their stick thing than I will have to walk.

Fat: Now this is ludicrous. I know Obesity is a problem in our country, but DMV or whoever you are that grants these signs, I say shame on you. You are promoting the fatness. Not only by giving them the sign are you rewarding them for having a couple more Crunch Wrap Supremes or Ho-Ho's, but you are preventing them from the one thing that might help them before they suffer from clogged arteries: the exercise it takes to walk from a farther parking spot outside BK to the line from which they will purchase their future death. Now I always get the,"I'm sorry, it's just gonna be a bit because we have to cook more fries," and I'm sick of it. If could just beat that fat man whose large van was parked horribly between a handicap spot and the holy grail of other spots then i would not have to wait for my craving to subside.

In summary, if you can walk (in any way shape or form for any period of time), have all of your extremities intact, and aren't in a wheelchair, then I say shame on you. For now, take the extra 15 seconds to get to your destination. Someday, your time will come when you get hit by a car or something and get one.

You pretend like it pisses you off, but if you could get one of those stickers you'd love it.

11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Fat people should get the antithesis of a handicapped parking spot... the ones on the outside border of the mall. Should be a different color of tag registration. "Oh, Fat Lady, we're sorry but now that your weight has risen past 250lbs you're no longer eligible for your handicapped or even your regular parking privileges. Get used to walkin, fatass, and soon you will be fatass no more."

On the note of obesity, I'm in college and I've started gaining weight. I'm about 5'11", and weigh like 210 pounds. (Studying, laziness due to long-time girlfriend, drinking...) At the beginning of college I worked out a lot, and weighed 180, so 210 is freaking me the fuck out. I'm in the process of fixing it (an hour a day at the gym, 5-6x/week) however. So, while I hate being mildly overweight, how can these fat fucks live with themselves when structurally sound they are still forced to get in the motorized buggies at grocery's and mall's? Have a little self-respect, people, seriously. I HATE FATTIES

10:03 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i propose a fat person mass genocide.
who's with me!?!

10:13 PM  
Anonymous Laura said...

Mass genocide for the morbidly obese! I'm in! Except let's try this; do like Saw where we kidnap them and leave them in a house filled with gym equipment and granola bars until they learn a healthy lifestyle.

9:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Stupid fat people. They park close and then get the motorized carts to drive to the snack aisle and load up on twinkies and lard. I'm in good shape. Give me the motorized cart for 15 minutes of fun. They should have to walk everywhere so there fat asses will get into some shape other than round. Fat fucks.

12:26 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i hate brad owers

5:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like fucking fat women

1:25 AM  
Anonymous anonymous said...

If you're saying they can walk the extra 5 minutes or whatever the length of the said parking lot is...then why can't you? Why are you complaining? Lazy block...

10:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

bex_davison@hotmail.com
i say i fucking hate fat women as they manage to flaunt their fat in a way that brings me to tears...sometimes of laughter and sometimes in shame. i hate made a group on facebook called 'i hate fatties' this is my passion!! i would love to hear from you fellow fattie haters, and even fatties if you can muster up an argument as to why fatties should be loved (other than the usual' we are humans too' crap) feel free u would make my day!! love to all
rebecca

10:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Wow. You people have WAY too much spare time.

10:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

http://hahaurefat.bebo.com
our little site lol it is really good i live in the uk and it is getting worse why should i have to look at it, it hurts my eyes. they should have self respect and not make excuses, in this country they say "im big boned" or "its in my genes" or "i have a slow metabolism" but do exercise, ure metabolism will speed up. no such thing as big boned and how the fuck can u have fat genes its cos u got fed too much as a kid like ure parents ya fat dumbass idiots get offf ure ass and go to the library.
(sorry if i offended anyone.....by swearing, if ure fat walk to a coach aeroplane whatever and find me maybe it will make u lose some weight.)

8:44 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

They ry to make life hard for us smokers as it's bad for our healt, bu why don't they come up with a fatties ban in Restaurants? Why do those people even complain?If I have to catch a plane I have to pay a penalty toll for every extra Kilo I bring along. But fat people get away with an extra 50 kg easily.
World's unfair fellas!

5:20 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home