Hate for God-Knows-What
I've been trying to figure out what JB here does and I can only come to one conclusion: professional snow shoveler. Anyone else have a guess?
I hate people that don't tip! I hate people that don't tip after asking me if its cold out there. Yes its FUCKING COLD, do you see the snow still on my sweatshirt. I hate people that don't tip and then say "have a great day!". Have a great day? Yeah I hope you get drunk and fall down the stairs, paralyzing you for the rest of your life, you cheap bastard. I realllly hate people who give you their payment in change and then say "keep the change!" WHAT THE HELL ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO KEEP! I hate people that look down when they're walking and are in the MIDDLE OF THE SIDEWALK! HEY! One side or the other motherfucker! Oh and ignoring me when I say excuse me... holy fucking crap you're the only one within 20 ft! LISTEN THE FUCK UP and GET THE HELL OVER! Sorry your little imaginary world that you watch by starring at the sidewalk is having a difficult crisis, but look up! LOOK UP SO YOU CAN SEE WHERE YOU ARE GOING! I hope you get hit by a fucking car. And I hope they're talking on their cell phone and eating at the same time while not wearing a seatbelt. That way you'll both die because I fucking hate those people too! You can't drive with both hands on the wheel so what makes you think that while talking into a cell phone you'll drive better? Where the fuck are you going in such a hurry that you really need to be on the phone!? Can't wait the five minutes it will take you to get anywhere near here that is worth being!? And you're eating too? Holy FUCK you've set a new standard for distraction! Why don't you juggle a couple rubber balls and fellate yourself too! Or hell, give yourself cunnilingus if you're female. Or maybe you're lucky and you have both! Go wild you fucking horrendous driver! Just make sure you hit the person who's not looking up while walking in the middle of the sidewalk after NOT TIPPING ME! Another thing, stop complaining that your life is terrible! I know people with fucking cancer you self-loathing bitch! I don't complain about my life, you know why? I have perspective on my life and I can recognize when my its terrible (i.e. I'll be dead in a couple of weeks because I developed a brain tumor) and when its just a touch not great (I didn't get a fucking tip goddamnit!). Yes I'm aware that I'm venting hate at a high level, doesn't mean I'm complaining... well maybe it does, but so what! FUCK YOU!